Minor Spoilers Ahead
This is a beautiful film. The scenery is majestic and captivating. There is more detail in the Light Sabers as the camera gets closer. The wildlife is bizarre and interesting to look at. The movie keeps with the Star Wars convention of having something the audience has never seen before in every shot.
The plot is unpredictable. This is saying a lot since the last Star Wars movie was almost a remake of A New Hope. There were multiple plot points that left me genuinely pleasantly surprised.
The acting was excellent from all parties involved. There was sincerely not a single scene that stands out to me as poor.
The Force Awakens sets up several large mysteries. First, who are Rey’s parents? Second, who is Supreme Leader Snoke? The answer to the first question is the worst possible answer: nobodies. This is the least entertaining answer possible. It is possible that this is a case of an unreliable narrator, but I wouldn’t bet on it. Since Snoke dies we won’t ever get an answer to who he was in the films. There is more on this in the Cancer section.
Joss Whedonism is rampant in this movie and it’s awful. Star Wars is a space opera. It has humorous moments, and definitely silly characters, but the series itself shouldn’t be reduced to Big Bang style snarky millennial replies. The movie should have a sense of timelessness and dignity befitting an epic. They should be attempting to create an instantaneous classic. These moments will not stand up well in the future.
A character in the movie has a very cool moment when she rams a cruiser through a Star Destroyer at faster than light speed. This is a very cool moment, but it raises many answers that break the continuity of the series. If FTL ramming is so powerful, why don’t they use faster-than-light cruise missiles instead of fighters? Why did the Rebellion bother attacking the Death Star with traditional ship combat? Why didn’t they simply ram it with an old, but massive ship?
Porgs are an obvious ploy to sell toys. Stop it, Disney.
The Cancer is strong with this one.
The Resistance, the good guys, is composed of non-white males and white women. The only good white men in the film that I can remember are Luke Skywalker and a soldier from the third act of the film who tasted the dirt and declared it was salt. The First Order, the bad guys, is almost entirely white and male. I looked very carefully and only a few east asian members of the side of darkness. The only woman-of-evil I detected was Captain Phasma. Of course, Phasma is also promoting the diversity narrative as a woman is the most badass and cool of the Stormtroopers. The message of this film is very clear; white males are the enemy.
The interesting thing about the diversity is that although the quantity of diversity is extremely high the quality, for lack of better word, is very low-normie tier even. There are blacks, latinos (latinix isn’t and never will be a thing, tranny supremacists), asians, and women in virtually every shot. What the movie lacks is Somalians, Indians (feather and dot), middle easterners, aborigines, Polynesians, etc. It’s curious how American the movie is in its diversity. What this means to me is that the people designing the movies aren’t advanced thinkers in the field of diversity. They are only mirroring what other people do. I think this is a good sign as it means they can be pushed through peer pressure to become less cancerous. They aren’t actually committed to diversity. They are only being trendy.
Vice Admiral Holdo is the worst thing to happen to cinema since the all-female Ghostbusters movie. She is literally purple haired. She is dressed in the most unmilitaristic fashion imaginable- a flowing dress of delicate fabric. She is clearly a shout out to all the terrible misandric cat lady political-lesbian feminists who are just now getting into science fiction now that they’ve colonized it. This is confirmed by all problem-glasses-enthusiast celebrating her.
There is a loss of the sense of legacy that permeates the Star Wars saga. Luke starts the new hope believing that Darth Vader killed his father, creating a revenge sub-plot. We then discover of course that Luke is the son of Vader, making Luke’s attempts to save his father and his father’s attempts to corrupt his son more compelling and complex. Luke’s lightsaber belonged to his father. In the prequels we discover that C3P0 and R2D2 also belonged to Anakin. Star Wars paradoxically isn’t a movie series about war. It is a story of a family. All of that is thrown out with this movie. Rey is the daughter of nothing and no-one (this could be an unreliable narrator). Yoda gleefully burns the Jedi texts. The mystery of who Supreme Commander Snoke is not merely unrevealed, but apparently forgotten.
This may seem like a point of preference rather than outright cancer. It is cancer because this is an attack on traditionalism, the concept of the family, of being tied to the past in anyway. Legacy and family is an import concept in traditional European story telling. In the Lord of the Ring the ranger Strider is revealed to be King of Gondor. King Arthur discovers his father is Uther Pendragon. Hercules’s power comes from his father, Zeus. This abandonment of the concept of blood and history is an attack on the western story telling tradition itself. A soft attack, perhaps, but an attack none the less.
The Rebels are now called the Resistance. This may seem like innocuous choice, but where there is liberals, there is signaling. In America “Rebels” have an association with the Confederacy and thus nasty gross white men who don’t do what New Yorkers want them to do. Can’t have that. “Resistance” appears to be a direct reference to the French Resistance in World War Two, making the First Order Nazis by default. It should also be noted that the good guys are fighting the First Order. They are literally fighting order itself.
The Resistance appears to be composed of non-state actors. They have minimal resources and apparently no homelands to defend. This isn’t really a civil war in the original Star Wars. The Resistance are much closer to the Taliban, ISIS, or communist guerillas.
Oh, and Snoke’s ship is literally called “Supremacy”. SJW’s are not subtle.
8/10 Quality, 10/10 Cancer
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- Blade Runner 2049 Review The Good, The Bad, and The Cancer - October 12, 2017